BookRiot: Trans and Non-Binary Authors

My world is a mass of muddy defrosting, dirty snow, and the excitement of the birds returning.  I love it when the birds come back out.  When the snow melts enough I will go back to putting cracked corn in the yard so I can have my duck friends visit.

I have to admit that vitamin D got me through the winter, taken on the recommendation of any local healthcare provider I speak with.  That’s my justification for complaining about winter is that even the healthcare providers tell everyone to keep up on their sunshine vitamins during the grueling months.

I like to use BookRiot’s recommendations for categories that have to do with someone’s ethnic background or gender preference/sexual proclivities.  Sometimes a google search leads me wrong and I feel voyeuristic combing author profiles for who they are and what they prefer.  Their perspectives are important and absolutely worth reading. Because their gender identity is something that has been salient due to their not aligning with their gender assignment, gender is considered in ways that someone like me, who is cis, never really thought about.  But that’s why we read harder, because those other perspectives deserve awareness and consideration.

But I’d prefer that BookRiot find them for me.  And even after they do, I don’t look into it further, like, are they non binary, or what were they born as, or whatever.

I also found that today’s choices could count for neurodiverse characters, and some other lists I have looked at have wanted to include authors from Africa.  These books push reading parameters in a number of ways.  And they were not easy reads, either one of them.

A Novel by a Trans or Non Binary Author:

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Freshwater, Akwaeke Emezi

A young woman is a host to a myriad of spirits in this book, and story is told in the points of view of the spirits who inhabit her.  And before she learns that she is in control of them (sorry, spoiler alert), they control her extensively.  She gives herself up to them through most of the book, although, looking back now that I am finished with it I can see where she gains control of them along the way more clearly.  And the reason I am sharing what the end is because through the book, I was wondering where this was heading, where the plot was.  It is an interesting story but it was a tale of a difficult life and I wondered where it was going and how it would end up.  It does end up in something.  I wanted to keep reading, even though I wasn’t sure if it had a plot.

This book got a decent amount of attention as a debut novel, but some people who reviewed it on Amazon struggled with it.  I enjoyed this book, but it pushes a lot of boundaries and topics I have not typically come across in novels, so I can see where some people truly felt they did not ‘get’ it.  And I might only ‘get’ it because of the amount of my life I have spent studying psychology and thinking about spirituality/mysticism.  I think the writing is obviously beautiful, but the content at times can be difficult, with self harm and rape, a woman struggling with literally her demons, losing a marriage to someone who always stood out and was special to her, as much as she didn’t want them to be.  We all have that person who despite the turmoil they can bring are incomparable to anyone else at that time in their lives.  I have had those people.  I would have hated to lose them in the times they were still so special to me.

This is worth picking up, but I know it isn’t for everyone.  Most books that get a lot of attention really aren’t for everyone.  They have intense psychological themes that are just too much or unrelateable for some people, enough to where the beautiful writing would not be enough to get them through. Like, my educated and well read father couldn’t understand my love for All the Light We Cannot See.

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An Unkindness of Ghosts, Rivers Solomon

I guess in writing my reviews and looking up other people’s opinions on the internet I am really seeing how these two books today are about trauma.  (And honestly it worries me about if my own book ever comes to fruition all the well thought out and articulate ways some people will not like it.)  A lower class woman with autism, Aster,  is living in a spaceship with clearly delineated social strata.  Her mother allegedly committed suicide but Aster realizes that she left messages behind and all might not be as it seems.  As in usual dystopian books, she bucks the system.  I won’t say how it ends, but if you have not read it, you might be able to guess enough even from there.  Rape and injustice are commonplace, and everyone notes when discussing this book that the upper classes have genders while the lower deck people are less gender conforming, less constrained by the strict heteronormative rules of above.

Criticism I read of this book indicated that people did not like the ending or that they felt it was too lucky or Aster didn’t display enough agency in the ending.  I don’t know if I missed something because I don’t know how she could have done more in what ended up happening, or how a book set up like this could have ended otherwise?  I had more of an issue getting into it in the beginning.  There seemed to be a lot of information to wade through before my brain could make sense of all of it to move forward.  It’s a lot of world building, and that’s important. One reviewer said it’s a mix between Battlestar Galactica, A Handmaiden’s Tale, and Roots. Listening to it helped because the narrator changed up voices, but even then sometimes I needed to slow it down.  It took me time to get into it.  About 20% through was when I caught on enough to move forward.

And I was driving to work during the last like 55 minutes of it, trying to stop and get my Wednesday Speedway coffee during one of the most dramatic moments.  Kinda interrupts the flow when you’re deciding which pot of house roast looks best and being convinced you left your friend’s borrowed Prius “key” on the counter because you were talking with the sales associate.  I frantically emptied my whole purse on her passenger seat which is probably a breach of friendship unless I get my butt over to vacuum it before I return it, which I will. And then after all that I return to the book where it’s all going to pot.

I also really liked the characters.  Some people said they didn’t feel fleshed out but I felt they were.  I saw in the blurb that Aster was autistic and I set out to 1. see if it was consistent with someone truly not neurotypical and 2. if this tidbit added to the plot.  I wouldn’t have picked up right away that she was, which I actually think is a good thing, because sometimes autism is more subtle, especially in females, and I didn’t want her to be a caricature.  And it added to the plot because she worked through some of her deficits, like her social struggles. So I liked it when initially I was skeptical.  I also very much like the the surgeon, who even though he was higher class was not afraid to be himself and not a mindless part of the brutality more endemic to his class.  I mean, I love healers, and healers who can see through the external trappings to the inner good in someone.

I am getting lots of writing done, which is awesome.  I wrote my first sonnet. I can’t say it’s a great sonnet but it felt overwhelming when it was assigned and I took a few weeks to get through it, and I did, and it won’t be a total embarrassment to post.  And my first wattpad piece is up!  I am writing under Teigan_Blake if anyone wants to check out my re-telling of The Legend of Sleepy Hollow, renamed Those Twinkling Spirit Lights.

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Reading Harder: Space Books by Authors of Color

The last day of March! April’s promise of Spring is a lot more reliable than March.  Plus, it’s Easter, which is usually the first holiday of the year that I spend with my sister and her family.  My son is complaining that it has been too long since we saw them in October, and I agree.  He doesn’t yet understand how hard his cousin is going to beat the pants off him in Nintendo when we all play together.

Have I made the Northeast look appealing yet?

I’m pleased with how much reading I got done in the dead of winter.  Because of my overzealous reading I am not as far into the challenge as I could be, but the point is to read harder, not blow through the list like the gifted kid whose parents refuse to move him up a grade because he needs social skills.

Also, books about space. Not usually my favorite.  I read them in the interest of sci fi and understanding the classics and the genres, but it holds little appeal to me.  I get why we do space exploration, but I have no interest in going out past my atmosphere in a little tube.  Naw.  At least on an airplane we can make a landing without bursting into flame, right?  I like the ground.   I am much more excited to read historical romances by authors of color.  Those have been downloaded onto my Kindle since before this challenge came out.

A Book by an Author of Color Set In/About Space

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Binti, Nnedi Okorafor

(Winner of a Hugo and a Nebula, of course)

I know, I know, this is part of a trilogy.  Honestly the bits are so short I don’t know why it isn’t all one volume.  I love Dr. Okorafor after Who Fears Death and I chose to listen to one of her shorts as read on the podcast,  LeVar Burton Reads.  I was a Reading Rainbow kid back in the day and that’s something that never changes.  So, I guess I should say, I am a Reading Rainbow kid.  I think LeVar could even romance my six year old somewhat reluctant reader to watch.  (I say somewhat because dude is showing a solid interest in comic books.  Just because it isn’t my dreams of Roald Dahl doesn’t mean it’s not important.  In the books department, he’s not like his mother, but he’s not me in sports either and that’s a good thing).

My favorite in this short book is the narrator. She is a powerful female going after her dreams of going far away to study math and science, at Oomza University, despite her family’s pressure to stay home.  And even on the spaceship over she doesn’t fit in:  She is the only human from her tribe on the ship, but also then is the only one who survives the takeover of the ship by the Meduse, a race with a vendetta against Oomza University, save for the captain so they can get there.  She bridges the communication gap and works out of her comfort zone to heal their vendetta, and not only because it is to her benefit.

I love strong females with powers that they use for the ultimate good. Dr. Okorafor’s heroines are special women who beat the odds, and even when you put them in a less familiar settings, I can always get emotionally involved with them.  Also, Dr. Okorafor has Binti solve the issue relationally instead of just kicking anyone’s ass until they are too scared of her to bother her.  It’s a solution I can get behind.  She uses her brain and relationships.  She uses something special and unique to her culture that also helps a completely different race.  Very cool.

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Babel-17, Samuel R. Delany

This epic pulpy cover is way more interesting than the boring one on my Kindle/Audible app.  And it would have changed my expectations of the novel more than the geometric cover:

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Like two entirely different books, right?  I thought this book was way more literary/artistic than something pulpy.  It was one of those science fiction books with heavy philosophical underpinnings.  This one specifically was about how language shapes thought and vice versa.  I have been reading more pulp lately while I am learning to write it, and this was definitely not the content of the scanned in pulp mags I was reading. And is that supposed to be the heroine Rydra Wong on the cover?

This book is beautifully written, with poignant metaphors and description I don’t expect to encounter in sci-fi.  I don’t know enough about the time in which it was written to really talk about how it compares to the sci fi books of the time in this aspect, I just enjoyed the striking images as I read.

However, reading it was like dreaming: some parts were really lucid and were cool and made sense, and other times I was lost as to what was going on, or what was supposed to be going on.  I just kept reading or listening until I was back to a part that made sense.  The concepts I caught were very cool and a second read through would probably help.  Just because a solid half of the book escaped me doesn’t mean it wasn’t a good book.  I don’t have a sci fi brain. Some reviews I read on Amazon suggested there are sci fi brains out there that caught it more than mine did.  I’d think that something truly pulpy would have concepts easier to access than these.

Also, another female protagonist, brilliant, fearless and still loved by her crew and equals, which is nice that a woman written in the sixties is powerful without being unappealing to men, but I didn’t connect with her like I did to Binti.   Rydra uses relationships too to outsmart the enemy instead of brute force, but I liked Binti as a heroine much better.   Maybe I was just jealous that Rydra could probably bust out the sonnet I am puzzling over for my monthly poetry group.

I keep telling myself I’m going to slow down on the novels and read writing books, material being published in magazines I’d like to be in someday, or my numerous collections of short fiction.  Or listen to a few of the Great Courses I bought for the sake of helping move my writing along.  They are difficult to slow down on, even when I am ahead on my posts, which I currently am. I still downloaded a novel on audio for a new category instead of my one on how sci fi works, which is more relevant to some current projects.  I still want to read more of last year’s prizewinners.  And this year’s when they come.  And there’s a new Han Kang short that looks a bit experimental but also well done.

I can’t.

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BookRiot 2019: Humor Books

I have to justify the exceptions I have made in this post to the I hate celebrity memoirs complaint that I have been blogging about for years.

I hate them, and I have talked about why likely on multiple occasions.  So then why, when I have to read a humor book, would I choose to read these?  There are plenty of funny books out there that aren’t autobiographies. But, there are plenty that are.  And not all of them are exercises in white privilege.

One of them I talk about in this post is, and one is most certainly not.

They were both mostly consumed via audio, as is always best with a humor memoir read by the author.

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Born a Crime, Trevor Noah

This audiobook was the highest-rated new book of 2016 and the best male narrator that year.  Very highly recommended by a friend of mine who, while very bright, doesn’t always go in for heavy books.  She has done her share of them, certainly, and when she tells me I need to read a heavier topic book I take heed.  I had to finally listen to this long time TBR surfer.

And it’s so not about white privilege and at times so very not funny that partway through the book I looked up the genre to be sure that I didn’t once again read something that I thought fit the BookRiot category but in fact did not once I had committed myself (The Friend, In Cold Blood, hopefully not etc). It’s the story of a man growing up colored (mixed race) in South Africa and apartheid.   Of course his brilliance is in finding a way to laugh at years of being a child who doesn’t fit in anywhere.   And the hardship afforded him by living in his place and time.  The lack of options. The struggle with not fitting in with the white or the black kids.

Essentially, his spicy mother, with her own rough personal history, steals this show.  This wouldn’t have been as brilliant, or as heartbreaking at times, without her.  She’s tough but she’s 110% heart, so even in her most desperate power struggles with her son and her most extreme parenting choices you can see her good intentions shining through.  Her constant efforts are always to get her kid into the kind of shape that wouldn’t participate in trouble and therefore go unnoticed for the darker forces in the world.  And even though she is tough, she is desperately loved and her son feels like a team with her against the world.  I love her devotion to God and her ability to survive and thrive despite all the misfortunes dealt her.  I even googled her face after reading this because I just had to see it.

So it is a credit to the other book I read that I could still get through it and care about the narrator despite the next universe level of privilege:

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Yes, Please, Amy Poehler

Also, a long time TBR lister, if that fact is surprising to you. It probably is.  The other memoirs I have read for past challenges were mostly not books I had been wanting and meaning to read.

But I had been meaning to read this because I read Bossypants by Tina Fey, and I wanted to read the other side of the comedy duo. I like Amy’s work with Tina.  And I liked this more than Bossypants, even though I feel that I have seen more of Tina’s work than Amy’s.

It was better because Amy’s brand of humor is not constantly self deprecating, like Tina’s is. Tina’s self deprecating humor is rampant in her show 30 Rock and her book is similar.  I had always thought that she was lovely and she talked about how fat and hairy she is in real life.  It can be funny, certainly, but it was in the teeth gritting amount of it. Amy made comments that she is short and has difficult eyebrows and her personality quirks, but they did not feel as central to the narrative.

The other reason I could stomach this after Born a Crime is the fact that Poehler emphasizes her luck throughout.  She openly acknowledges a life of unconditional love and support from her family and how she saw things a differently than people who didn’t have that experience.  And she has a whole chapter on mindfulness, which she states is time travel, which is an interesting way to put it.  Mindfulness is about taking more control of your feelings and thoughts, but she makes it even more evident by framing it as a way to control time.

Poehler is funny and poignant, of course, and she put in a lot of time to be where she is, which is a good reminder to anyone who really wants to make it in the creative world (and academic world, for that matter.  It took me over ten years to go from HS grad to licensed Psychologist) but she also takes the time to be grateful.  She talks about motherhood and those young years with no money but all the time in the world in ways I can relate to.  Because yes I’m privileged too.  I love how she talks about motherhood and her silly boys and the active decision not to answer questions in a way that could scar them for life.

One of the only things she wrote about that I couldn’t really relate to was doing drugs.  It’s never been super appealing to me and I mostly just drank during my youth, in amounts in college that were not healthy but a certain level of drunk was way more optimal then than it is in my sweet mom, full time job, chasing the writing/running thing life.  I like to sleep and too much alcohol ruins a good 9-10 hour go on the weekend.

I don’t expect the privileged to grovel for forgiveness in their privilege.  I certainly don’t have that kind of time.  But when you take a moment to breathe in the sweetness you have been dealt, and use your privilege for the improvement of the lives of others, that’s better than drinking yourself into ruin and lamenting your lost looks.  I mean, often washed up stars that end up like that have their own trauma and demons.

So I have my excuses, but I did enjoy both of these.  And I have been pleased with my TBR getting hacked into this year.  I’m probably reading too much long and should be burying my face in shorts because I have been writing those for submission.

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BookRiot: Nonhuman Narrators

Happy St. Patrick’s Day!

I met my husband at a St. Patrick’s Day party nine years ago, and no,  it’s not a sordid tale of debauchery.  Nine years ago it was in the middle of the week so there was nothing crazy going on, I was coming home from work when I stopped in and was going to work again the next day, so, nothing too interesting.  The first thing my oh so lucky husband said to me was “Do you want to try some of the wine I made?'”  I was like, sure, all the time thinking there was no way this guy is just hanging out single waiting to be snapped up.   But he was! And there were (obvs) no serious deal breakers involved.  Luck o the Irish, indeed.

We got married in an Irish pub and had an Irish band and I’m half Irish, but he isn’t any Irish at all, try as he may to emulate my fine people.

I also had some fun years in college making my own Shamrock Shakes with some festive mix-ins.  I never went to the parade when I lived in Scranton, although my friends came down one year and we went out when it was over and we got to see some guy’s bare rear end in the pub we went to.  Not the guy I married, I didn’t meet him for 4-5 more years.  He was past his ‘show your butt to strangers’ phase by then.  And no, the featured image is not the engagement photo that came a year after that fateful night.

Anyway.  The books I talk about in this post have nothing to do with the holiday, because I just didn’t plan it that well.   And this is a family blog!  Rated PG!  Maybe PG 13 sometimes, when I am talking about romance novels.

Somehow it turned out that both of the books I read for this category have not only to do with non human narrators, but also totalitarian governments.  They both felt surreal at times too, in their own ways.  And neither were cutesy in the least, despite some appealing protagonists.

A Book In Which an Animal or Inanimate Object is the Point of View Character:

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The Bees, Laline Paul

This has been waiting on my kindle since late 2015.  I’m really pleased with how the reading challenge has been helping with the backlist.

I love social insects. I took an Animal Behavior course in college and I spent the semester fascinated.  I did my project for that class on ants.  I love a novel that can combine science or history with story, use real research to create a plot and a character arc.  I loved how Flora 717, the lowly Sanitation worker, used smells and transmission of information via antennae and to receive the Queen’s Love.  Because Flora 717 can transcend her station, Paul also talks about what it is like to forage and collect pollen, dance out the coordinates for the other foragers, see the ultraviolet in the flowers that human eyes cannot detect, how to keep the hive clean, and what it was like to (traitorously) lay an egg.  She found a way to talk about most aspects of being a bee that could not normally be described with a typical single bee, one that operates within the typical restricted role.  The drones were believable pains in the butt. Then she frosts on the anthropomorphism to make their structure make sense to us.  Describing their emotional lives, the high of Love that binds them into a whole.  And sometimes, it was brutal and bloodthirsty, but I won’t give the details of those parts because they are well imagined and I am not a spoiler.

And the other bugs…the nasty wasps, the sneaky spiders, the bluebottle flies all add interest to the structure and lives of the bees.  Somewhat of a bee dystopia.  Or utopia?  Not sure.

This book felt surreal in parts.  Sometimes I needed to give it time to figure out what was going on, when she was exploring prophecies and given other roles within the hive by a priestess.  I missed it that she was a mutant, which allowed her to move into other niches.  Initially I was like, how is she being allowed to move between classes and roles?  This book was beautiful and well done, but sometimes it didn’t hold my attention well.  That could be my problem.  But it’s worth reading.   And anyone can comment if its a bee dystopia or utopia.

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Memoirs of  Polar Bear, Yoko Tawanda

I broke my rule that I struggle to stick to for this challenge and bought this book specifically for this challenge. It was intriguing, with its magical realist underpinnings, to read three generations of polar bears who are also, inexplicably, writers.  The grandmother and mother were stage performers, where the grandson was merely an exhibit in a zoo.  They all end up talking about their experiences as bears in different places and times with different roles.  it was interesting and beautiful in parts.  Bears loving their human masters.

But it could also be surreal and felt inconsistent, and Goodreads didn’t disagree. At times, when I feel like I might not ‘get’ a book, I look into what others had to say about it to see what I may have missed, and this time, people generally agreed that this book could be difficult to understand.

Some parts were interesting, like the sea lion who steals the grandmother’s writing and publishes it behind her back while telling her it’s nothing, and then other times, it felt inaccessible, like when the daughter was talking about her animal trainer, and I didn’t always know who was narrating.  Perspectives changed sometimes.  Sometimes they were too hot, being in the wrong part of the world, and they ate a lot more than humans, and they lived lives that could be sad.  People who liked weird books weren’t necessarily into this one, it seemed to resonate with people who liked a certain brand of weird.  I couldn’t decide if there was a plot or not, and what about the meaning of the celebrity cameo at the end of the last section.

But some felt it was hypnotic, moving, and metaphorical.  To each his own.

I’m absolutely open to what others thought of these books.  They were less accessible in places to me than some of the ones I have read lately, but that doesn’t mean they aren’t worth the time to read.  And it seems weird that they are both in the context of rigid governmental structure.

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2018 Prize Winners warning me not to quit my day job

It still resonates with me that when the Goodreads Choice Awards came up last year, I hadn’t read that came out that year to vote on.  It was an awesome reason why I hadn’t read anything that was in the running, but I missed reading the new stuff.  I usually try to hit the prizewinners of the year as well as some of the releases that look good.  I am going to try to read some 2019 releases, but before I did that, I caught up on two major prize winners for 2018.

I have been catching up too on other books that have been on the TBR too long, too, which will be discussed as the year goes on.

(Also, happy fourth Blog-A-Versary to me!  It’s kept me writing and thinking about my reading, which is awesome.)

Interesting about both of the prize winners I talk about have to do with the life of the writer, among other things. And the writerly talk is depressing, which makes me feel that I am brave as I am submitting and writing for immediate submission more than ever before in my adult life.  But I’m not sure how real my bravery is because I have a day job that, although it burns out my brain to the point where it can be hard to write on the side, I feel good about, fulfilled, and proud of, and how my writing career does or does not pan out will not detract from a sense of satisfaction as it already is.  So it frees me up a little emotionally, without all my eggs in one basket, so to speak.

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The Friend, Sigrid Nunez

National Book Award Winner 2018

This haunting story is a warning:  don’t spend your life on writing if you can possibly make a life out of anything else.  Even the writer successes in this one come with crippling disappointment and anti-climactic teaching careers. There’s a lot of suicide.  The person that the main character is addressing through the novel is a victim of suicide.  A brilliant person who couldn’t be alone and was relegated to dealing with students, and then after his death gives the narrator a dog of his that is completely impractical for her to take care of, on top of heartbreaking.  Because I love having pets but they always break your heart when they die.  And this is a big dog that barely fits in her apartment and won’t live long  besides.  I spent part of the book praying this wouldn’t be a redo of The Art of Racing in the Rain where I just sobbed like an idiot for an hour at the end.

Despite the depressing story, it was still beautifully written and astute.  It wouldn’t be as depressing if it wasn’t as astute.  The artistry, to me, was that the narrator could wander into different parts of the story and it flowed beautifully from one aspect to the other:  the wives of the friend who gave her the dog, why they weren’t lovers and why his wives were jealous of this, how she gets the dog, how writing/teaching writing sucks, then more about how she gets to keep the dog, and then some on her therapy sessions to manage her grief and reflect on her not getting married or having a family herself, and what this means about her particular grief.  And then more about the relationship with the dog, and then more about her relationship to the dead person that she addresses throughout in second person.  Then some ex wife backstory. It was beautifully done.  Sometimes I was like, how did I get over here to this aspect of the story?  I could use more practice making things flow like that.

Also, this was another one that I mistakenly thought fit into a BookRiot category.  I thought the dog might narrate this business.  The weird cover with the dog suggests that.  The dog isn’t what makes the cover weird, it’s the blocks of color .  I’m like really, because a lot of people die in this at their own hand after years of emptiness. The dog is cool but the primary school colors gives the wrong vibe here.  Thank goodness this beautiful depression was short.

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Less, Andrew Sean Greer

Winner of the Pulitzer Prize, 2018

This one looked completely unappealing to me for like, ever.   I wasn’t sure I’d care about the protagonist and his issues.  It’s a little first world problem-y in an Eat Pray Love kind of way.  Like, yeah, a major relationship ending is hard, but it’s a little easier when you can shake it off traveling the world, and, oh yeah, maybe live some writer dreams.

Except that these are only dubious writer dreams. He wrote maybe one notable book of a few of them, and some people have read them, but not to the point he would be recognized on a plane or anything. He’s up for an award, but his publisher rejects his most recent attempt at a novel and he’s trying to fix it, despite some follies that get in the way, and the whole reason he’s even on this trip with it’s weird bouts of illness, faulty German, bizarre clothes and random lovers is to avoid an ex boyfriend’s wedding.   His honors are dubious and the author is very funny, and it had an appreciable twist at the end.  I didn’t know how it would end, and nearer the end I suspected I was getting a surprise, but I liked how it ended.  Compulsively readable, almost as much so as Where’d You Go, Bernadette.  Heavy warnings that if you can do anything other than write with your life, you probably should.

So, good for me I have done that. Getting traction with submitting writing has proven to be slow.  I become intimidated when researching a publication by what they have accepted, so sometimes it’s easier for me to just look at a call for submissions, see if I can think up anything fast enough, and go.  All these, MFA, previously published in, I don’t know, Harpers, Tin House, The New Yorker, places I don’t know if I would ever have the stones to send anything to.  My first rejection of the year was very kindly done, even if it was a form email.  It told me to keep up the hope. These stories tell me to focus my energies elsewhere.

I’m trying to do a better job looking at new releases this year.

I hope Spring is starting to take decent hold, wherever you are.  D vitamins have helped, but every winter gets long.

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For the Love of Epistolary Novels

I forgot to mention that January went okay.  It went better emotionally than it can sometimes.  I’m not really sure why. I have been making more of an effort to look at calls for submissions and actually writing something and crossing my fingers.  I figure even if the writing is rejected I can find other homes for it. As long as the writing is happening right now, that’s what I need.  And I need to focus on showing up when all the crippling doubt sets in.  Especially because I have committed myself to writing poetry again which is a total mind-f.  But you’re here for my scintillating perspectives on my reading problem.

Reading Problem #1000: It seems that epistolary novels especially are some sort of drug to me because I binged on them even harder than usual.  I think I have determined their especial binge-tastic appeal.

  1. They have short chapters, which really keep me going into the night. Just two minutes?  Kindle underestimates my reading speed so that’s only like 30 seconds and I definitely could put off sleep for 30 more seconds.  ooh this chapter is a picture.  Only like a page of IM conversation?
  2. Also, conversations are probably my favorite part of books.  Interactions between people over descriptions and long inner monologues.  And when you are doing letters and IMs, which were the main way I held my far away friends and a long distance boyfriend close in college, I think they bring back for me the joy I have had in my own interactions like that in my life.  I had those IMs while falling in love as a young adult.  And while those fallings in love didn’t pan out, they were the stuff of joy when they were happening. Flooded my brain with the happy chemicals. I have stopped liking phone conversations and it’s rare to get one out of me, unless you’re my client.  Or my parents.
  3. Both of these books I review on this post have the slow reveal that I have been hammering out in my own novel and I was reading to see how these authors did it.

I might not have binged as much if I read the novels I had originally intended, but then BookRiot listed out these great modern ones that had been on the TBR forever and that was it.

An Epistolary Novel:

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Love Letters to the Dead,  Ava Dellaira

This book is really relevant. It’s about broken families and childhood dreams, trauma and healing as universal experiences.  First loves and relationships moving from childlike idealizing to knowing our most loved people as they really were, flaws and pain and all.

The protagonist is picking up the shards of her life following a family tragedy in the form of letters to tragically deceased famous people.  People who lived their versions of her pain and trauma.  People to whom she never met but could relate.  The answers to the mysteries come at a good pace, the blanks filled in in a satisfying way, and everyone heals.  Slowly and sometimes subtly, but they do.  Not just the broken family but other characters dealing with teenage relationship themes and issues.  She talks about the details of the star’s life that she can relate to and emphasize with.

I thought the incorporating of the celebrities was well done.  It could have been either too loosely connected/relevant or too many details of the celebrities to whom she was writing, but it was neither.    And she gets a chance to heal while many, if not all of the dead celebrities, never got or took that chance.  She gets to grow.  And I love the pure magic of healing wherever I find it.

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Everything, Everything, Nicola Yoon

I was almost embarrassed that I am trying to write YA without having read this, especially since it became a movie. A-mazing.

One of my kids accidentally spoiled this on me, but she didn’t really spoil it, because once I knew how the main situation was going to change I focused on how it was revealed.  How did the big twist come about. How did she change as a result?  How did her change make others change?  The whole time I wanted to know how Yoon was going to pull it off.

Other that the writerly part, this is just like YA classic good stuff. A first love.  How people learn to be together and share their vulnerabilities.  All that stuff you cut your serious relationship teeth on.  I don’t want to say too much because any reader of mine knows my attempts at avoiding spoilers.  If there’s like, any other YA aficionado out there who hasn’t read this.  Which there really might not be, especially since it became a movie in 2017.  And I forget it’s not 2018 anymore, other than when I realize I didn’t read any 2018 but I’m getting there.

Next week is two other epistolaries. And they aren’t Pamela and Possession, which is what I originally wanted to do for this post, Possession because I have tried to read it twice and finally got the audio to best the thing (many people whose opinions I respect like this book so I need to win) and I shamefully don’t feel like investing in an old novel right now with Pamela.  I mean, it’s about her trying to avoid getting raped at work.  I just want something less depressing than that right now.  It’s been on the TBR forever because I want to someday read the authors that influenced Jane Austen with Austen in mind.  But there are young adults falling in love in ways I fell in love as a young adult and all that dopamine gets coursing around when I read these.   And I read four books from one BookRiot category before I know it and lose sleep because of it’s appeal.  TBR tackling at its finest.

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BookRiot: Award winning authors

My son can’t decide if he thinks my laptop wallpaper is cute or stressful.

Its a kitten either trying not to fall off something or trying to climb on something.  I like the picture because I liked that the cat had gotten itself into something or was about to get itself into something.  I can be like that.  I can’t always be happy just chillin, I have to be making my own entertainment.

Two on a theme again this week:

A book by a female or author of color that won a literary award in 2018

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Hello, Universe, Erin Entrada Kelly

2018 winner of the Newbery Medal for outstanding contribution to children’s literature

Good middle grade novels, especially involving middle schoolers like this one does, always involve a whole heap of uncomfortable awkwardness poured into a relatively unique situation, which is exactly what this book is.  It’s about kids who don’t fit into molds coming together through an almost emergency situation and friendships in common.  And, even better, which is what the market is looking for right now, one of the perspective characters is a deaf girl.  More engendering empathy.    Another child, Virgil, is Latin American, and he isn’t as effusive as the rest of his family.  Another one who talks about how he doesn’t fit in.  And, slight spoiler alert, he has a crush on the deaf girl, which is also excellent. It’s a great kids book and was a quick read for me.  I hope it doesn’t count as like a cheat read because I have some Coretta Scott King award winners on tap for this year.  Although that category specifies children’s or middle grade.  This category doesn’t.  Newbery Medal winners are always worth reading, though, and this could possibly go on the list of what I might share with my son.

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How Long til Black Future Month, NK Jemisin

Winner of the 2018 Hugo Award for The Stone Sky

Now, possibly Hello Universe could have been a cheat read if I also hadn’t tackled this one.  I have been wanting to read NK Jemisin but I haven’t wanted to commit myself to her science fiction novels.  Even though they have been recommended to me as sci fi/fantasy that isn’t based on white European medieval social structure or heteronormative narratives.  I wanted to taste her work and I am working on my own short stories, so it’s always a good idea to read what the masters are putting out.

I actually read the introduction, which gave me hope as a writer for two reasons:  one, she didn’t come into her writing prime until she was older than I am now, which is good because I am just starting out and I get into this idea that other people got into their glory faster than I would ever hope to.  If there’s even a glory for me to be had in this.  I can’t assume that.  And second, that she used the word sharted, and it wasn’t edited out and it was allowed to stay there as a sign to me that this book was worth reading.  On top of, you know, all her accolades from people who are allowed to give meaningful ones.  She was talking about sharting out science fiction that was more the stuff that white guys churn out to get noticed in a market that wasn’t ready for diverse voices.  In case your shart curiosity was piqued, which mine would have been.

Some of these I really loved, like Red Dirt Witch (one that many others on the reviews enjoyed) Valedictorian, Cuisine des Memoirs, L’Alchimista, and Sinners, Saints, Dragons and Haints, in the City Beneath Still Waters.  Some of them got away from me, like science fiction can for me, and I get a little lost.  Maybe because the stuff that is more out there to me isn’t as interesting so my brain stops participating.   It happened with the PKD book.  I wondered if other reviewers had a similar experience and they really didn’t seem to.  The stories that I enjoyed I noticed had more of a human element to them.   They were good, though, fantastical, creative, sharp in its portrayal of race and class.    I think Red Dirt Witch is popular because its about black people seeing the future of the human rights movement and becoming hopeful that the world can change for them.  And not just, you know, a black  person in the white house, but the realities of the riots and protests.

I had this on audio to work through it, but it had more to do with the genre than her writing.  When she really has the page space to spin out her world building I might have to pay harder attention because I imagine it is extensive and cool.

Clearly both of these women are award winning authors in their premises and stories.

I really read too much for the next two posts, so stay tuned.  Still binge reading.

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